Don’t know nothin’ ’bout birthin’ no babies
Posted By startswithanx on May 19, 2008
Mommy Dearest: so misunderstood.
**Note. This blog was supposed to debut on Mother’s Day but Mama (that would be me, not my mom) ran into a few obstacles. Try to appreciate the message, not the holiday reference. That said, here I present the first Starts With an X post.
Two total strangers felt inclined to wish me Happy Mother’s Day today. First, the guy who took our tickets at the movies. “Theater 16, to your left. Oh, and Happy Mother’s Day.” Then, a man outside a grocery store. “Thank you for signing this petition ma’am and, before I forget, Happy Mother’s Day to you.”
If I knew what it was like to pass a human through my vagina I may have appreciated the gestures. But I’m the chick who wants to know just how long the infant was crying in any shaken baby syndrome case.
I’m in my early 30’s, of average build, dress, shall we say “with it,” and have zero car seats, spit up stains, scrapbooks or proud parent bumper stickers to speak of. So, I’d like to know why exactly these two middle aged men looked me over and thought, “Yeah, she looks like she knows a thing or two about placenta.”
They may as well have wished me a Happy Cocksucker’s Day, I was so insulted. (I guess technically I am a cocksucker but to have someone identify you in a crowd as one wouldn’t be a joyous thing.) So, I ask you, dear readers (all three of you), was I justified in taking offense to these strangers’ greetings? Why or why not?
I can guarantee you any Mother that reads this post will take offense that you had the audacity to have taken offense. You should have asked why they assumed that you were a Mother it would be interesting to see what their take was.
I think you were justified. This actually happened to me when Matt and I got back to Seattle from our honeymoon. I had about three men say happy mothers day to me! I was offended, Matt on the other hand couldn’t understand why I was offended. I guess because they assumed and for the fact that I am not a mother!!
I received many a text on mothers day wishing this childless (by choice)woman a happy mothers day, I too was a little taken back. I was thinking they were texting me because they were mothers and were fishing for the same in return. Then when the wonderful woman that gave birth to me gave me a mothers day card from my 4 dogs with a gift inside, I changed mind. Shallow? maybe ok yes.
I would have to say I take a little offense to your statements. I happen to be a Mother and was also wished a Happy Mothers Day without any children around me. I also happen to be “in my early 30’s, of average build, dress, shall we say “with it,” and have zero car seats (within view of the person wishing me Happy Mothers Day), spit up stains, scrapbooks or proud parent bumper stickers to speak of.” Do you honestly think this is how all Mothers look?
Why are people so easily offended? Can’t we all just get along? I would like to wish all you out there Happy Smokey and The Bandit Day!!! I hope I don’t offend anyone that hasn’t seen this Trans Am classic.
Oh by the way Smokey and The Bandit premiered on this day in 1977. OH YEAH!!!!
As a mother of two… I also haven’t had the opportunity to experience the passing of a body through my vagina. But there was that one night… Seriously, I had emergency c-sections. The emergency was that I was not about to let those lil bastards ruin my beautiful cooch. Okay, that wasn’t the reason… but it sounds quite American, doesn’t it?
I digress. Being a mother is by far ONE of the most special roles a woman has. There’s no pay, no annoying interview process and even death doesn’t get you out of this one. But take it as a compliment, bitch (said with a smile). To date, my relationship with my daughters is just about my only successful relationship to date. Note: my kids are two- and four-years old. I have a lot of time to work in the dysfunction.
X, you crazier than I originally suspected! Love ya!
I can see where you’re coming from although I am shocked that you’d compare being labeled a Mom as equally insulting as being publicly identified as a cocksucker. I, on the other hand had the exact opposite experience on Mother’s Day. I went to breakfast with Greg using Mother’s Day as the excuse…and I did not get a Happy Mother’s Day greeting from anyone in the restaurant. I overheard several other ladies around me being greeted in this manner. I was offended to have not been noticed as a mother that day…especially after what I went through 9 years ago “to pass a human through my vagina”!
hotstuff,
I’d like to answer your question, since you were nice enough to answer mine — kind of. Yes, I do think that all GOOD moms look like that. If you’re a good mom you can’t tell me you’ve never owned a car seat or rocked a spit up stain. You may, however, be able to say you haven’t scrapbooked or stuck a proud parent sticker on the back of your car. Both personally make me queasy but have got to make some kid feel quite special. I, on the other hand, have never owned/sported any of the items in question.
Thanks for reading. And, uh, look out for a “Good Mom” post in the future.
hmmm, thanks for the response X – but I still need to disagree. I have been told I am a “Good Mom” (I’d like to think I’m a “Good Mom”) yet I have never had a spit up stain. quite simply – my kids were not pukers. And yes, I do agree that “Good Moms” have car seats in their vehicles – but as I stated I was no where near my vehicle when I was wished Happy Mothers Day, so the person could not have been going off of that. Maybe they wished you Happy Mothers Day because of those child bearing hips. LMAO – just kidding. All in all – I would have to say I don’t think it’s an insult to be wished Happy Mothers Day. I think it’s much worse to be a 28 year old with a 3 year old little girl and have a cashier ask (when handing her a lollipop) “is that OK with your grandma????” That is an insult.
I don’t think you should be offended, granted I’m not a woman nor a father, so I may be way off base here. But I think people were just wishing you a happy mother’s day out of the kindness of their hearts. I doubt the gestures were mean spirited. Besides, what’s wrong with being a mother? There are worst things people could assume you are. Some women who kill to be a mom and can’t. I take it you don’t fall into that category. On a positive note, I think you’re funny and can’t wait to read more. You got me thinking about something I’ve never thought about before.
When i was teenager and was toting my siblings around people would say, “Aw your kids are so cute how old are they?” In total disgust i would respond, “uh i’m 15 and these are my brothers and sister.” Maybe not quite the same thing as your experience but i can understand your point. I think that people shouldn’t assume that everyone who is 25 or older is a mother. And if you are a mother (like me) of course its nice to hear someone tell you Happy Mother’s Day..so to Izayus’s mom Happy Mother’s Day!
i feel you dog. just because you are a grown woman does not mean you are a mother, or would like to be for that fact. i live in Momolandia, where if you are 25 or older, a woman, single and/or childless, you are a freak (or at least that is how certain people re-act). “You don’t have any kids?” They ask incredulously. “Why not?” wow, peeps. in case you haven’t heard, it’s no longer a requirement. so yeah i see where you are coming from, and then the fact that these perpetrators where men, would have bothered me even more-just the patriarchy baring itself and telling you to get your ass back in the kitchen..woman!
I can not believe that you would take offense to someone saying a kind word to you, even if you are not a mother. You have a mother, you know mothers, why would you be offended by someone giving you a compliment. That is like getting offended when someone says Merry Christmas. Maybe you don’t celebrate Christmas, would you still be offended by that. Just something I will throw out there
short and sassy,
I would not be offended if someone wished me a merry Christmas, no. However, if I were Jewish, or maybe even the Grinch, I might take offense.
So, does that mean that your father or maybe husband shouldn’t take offense to someone wishing them Happy Mother’s Day, since they have mothers and know mothers?
X
Smooth operator said it best!